8 basic rules for a happy life

Wait, What?? Just 8 steps for happiness..?? Yes, you read it right…!! Who on earth doesn’t want to be happy?? Throughout my life, I haven’t met at least one person, who doesn’t want to be happy. According to me ‘happiness’ is a feeling which comes within me, when I’m proud of something that I did..and I don’t believe in momentarily happiness, because I feel they are unhealthy in a way or just memories…!! So, let’s see how we can embrace a blissful life.

1.No one should make you angry without your permission: To my knowledge, ‘Anger’ is responsive feeling of every living things in an annoying environment. There are moments especially for parents, where we all unleash our anger and shout at kids. And most of the times, we may feel guilty afterwards. When we allow outer world to access our inner world, there is no guarantee that you can maintain your inner peace. So, it’s very important that we should hold the strings of our feelings and never let anyone to steal our joy. Well, in these lockdown days I’m practicing the same and I know it’s not that easy task. However, I believe practice and patience are the keys for achieving this power of perception..

2. Live in present and accept the moment and yourself as it is: Do you remember in one of our previous post we discussed about the mindless act of wasting our time and energy about the things that we cannot change..( if not here is the link- https://lafemina.home.blog/2020/07/04/6-simple-ways-for-boosting-your-self-esteem/)

Accept- then Act…Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it…Not against it..This will miraculously transform your whole life..

Eckhart Tolle

For greater understanding, I can share a personal moment using this acceptance key. While my last visit to India, we went to Munnar (hill station-south India)to see the spectacular view of neelakurinji (Strobilanthes Kunthianus) blooms which is only once in 12 years …our family including kids who were in the heights of excitement, patiently waited in the endless queue and then hiked around 2 km to the tippity top of the mountain to see the dreamy valley bathed in blue shades..

Atlast, for our disappointment there wasn’t any blue blooms…all of it were dried out … I freaked out..you can imagine the level of disappointment..it begin with thinking of opting a wrong destination for the trip..!!And wondered why at least one of the returning tourist didn’t gave us a clue…!! And then I looked around and saw people grimacing and murmuring to themselves..Then I realised the fact that, the reality of the moment was that, the blooms season is done..thinking about it will spoil my present moments with my family..From there on, I forcefully focused my thoughts into the future, as well as encouraged others to follow the same…To my surprise tons of blissful moments awaited us in munnar thereafter ..So, what I wanted to convey is, if you have absolutely no control over the situation, it’s beneficial to practice acceptance than resistance..

3. Take conflicts as an opportunity to teach and learn: Conflicts are inevitable part of both social and family life..conflicts between couples, parents and kids, at work place so on..When we learn to handle a conflict in a constructive way, then it’s an opportunity for learning, teaching and connecting..And the only trick work here is to camly focus on the solution respecting both parties feelings and thoughts..I know during this lockdown days there will be tons of reasons for kicking off conflicts in families, but remember it’s an opportunity..

“Every conflict presents you with a choice. You can choose to view conflict as an opportunity to teach or as an opportunity to blame & punish..“

Dr. Becky Bailey -Easy to love difficult to discipline.

4.The only person you can change is you: Ok, let me tell you a story – Once upon a time there lived a man who loved to spend his leisure time on social media, watching movies, exploring all eateries ..hmm, somewhat like an average techie. Somehow from one day, he surprised everyone by focusing on the creative aspect of life..gradually, his wife started to get inspiration from his transformation..when they started to spend their time and energy in constructive and creative way, they could inspire and motivate the people surrounding them, which in turn made them feel proud and happy…Do you like the story..??If yes, let me share you a secret..the wife in the story is myself..☺️ So, what I wanted to emphasis here is that, the only person who you can change is yourself ..And the change should be self driven ..this will give a chance for the surrounding people to get inspired..!!

5.What we focus on, expands: This can be explained as simple law of attraction..whatever energy we choose to focus our thoughts on, is exactly what we will attract into our reality..For instance, we can count to gazillion numbers .. it’s not because we were born as Newton or Ramanuja..In our childhood we took conscious effort(focus) to learn the numbers..!! Likewise, we are capable of numerous possibilities..Just want to focus on what gives us peace and happiness so the same expands.. !!

6. See the best in one another rather than comparisons: It is said that when you choose to see the good in others , you endup finding the good in you..And remember every minute you compare yourself with others, is the minute you wasted in your life..Consciousness and gratefulness are the keys for preventing our mind from comparisons and the consequences that follows.. !!

7.Know that money alone can’t bring you happiness: Money can’t alone bring you happiness…however it can make you feel comfortable while you’re being depressed. So, stop running behind money and enjoy the moments of your life..Amidst the busy working days what we use to practice is a family dancing session, which doesn’t cost you a penny..but in turn it gives you plenty of room for bonding and get rid of all your worries…!!

8. Our Happiness should come within us: Don’t wait for others to make you happy..I believe, I’m responsible for my own happiness. It can be made possible only by satisfying our physical,mental and spiritual levels.I can provide example for better understanding..

1. Physical level happiness– eg: finding time for self care activities like exercise, bathing etc..

2. Mental level happiness– eg: following your passion may be painting, singing, writing, photography…etc

3. Spiritual level happiness– eg: helping poor and needy, showing kindness, meditation..etc

So, let me conclude by reminding myself as well as you that happiness is not by chance, but by choice…Hope this one helps you to focus on more happiness amidst this pandemic days…!!Thank you..don’t forget to share your thoughts and feel free to like, follow, reblog/share…have a wonderful week ahead..